Without Fear

I finally gave myself two hours aside to watch George A. Romero’s Survival of the Dead. This is the 6th Dead movie that Romero has made, and though the original trilogy only kept getting better it certainly feels like this second trilogy just keeps getting more unmemorable. Land was actually quite terrible but at least Romero was swinging for the bleachers. Diary was just completely amateur and bad for anyone, but so sad knowing the master of the zombie genre had sunk so low. Now we have Survival, which is just completely averagely lame.

The basic premise is the soldier who raids the Winnebago in Diary (yeah, he WAS the best thing about the movie – not saying much) is now the main player and we follow him as he manages to find out about an island and decides to head there hoping to find safety, maybe a little isolation and peace. Instead, he finds two warring family/clans that are just unbelievably stupid and ignorant in the face of the end of the world. I kind of think that was Romero’s point, that humans are the problem, their petty problems would carry over. I don’t know about that but I know what I thought of this movie, so here are those thoughts:

Alright, I’m now going to heat up some lasagne and watch Survival of the Dead #zombiesonhorses Giddy. Up.

Pretty sure an exploding head doesn’t work like that-and these soldiers should care more. #zombiesonhorses

Oh damn, it’s the soldier from Diary of the Dead-he was easily the best actor in that hot shaft. #zombiesonhorses

There’s the horse-hey, lady, get off the zombie’s horse! #zombiesonhorses

First real scare of the movie-the audio of the door opening is dialed up to 11. #zombiesonhorses

The old man is fine with killing a human lady but draws the line at zombie kids-priorities man. #zombiesonhorses

Is that chick rubbing one out-around a bunch of sex crazed soldiers-and they don’t care-PLOT HOLE. #zombiesonhorses

Moaning zombie heads on pikes-that’s actually pretty damn cool. #zombiesonhorses

How’d DJ Squalls-a-like ever survive the zombie apocalypse? #zombiesonhorses

I like Romero is obv keen to use new tech but it never feels organic-where’s the electricity coming from to charge things? #zombiesonhorses

Fishing for zombies, on a slanted roof, at night. That guy deserves to die. #zombiesonhorses

I’ll never call my beloved zombies ‘dead heads’ ever. You hear me? Never. #zombiesonhorses

How is that zombie changing gears? #zombiesonhorses

Ooh, Ghost Rider zombie, seriously http://twitpic.com/25dqrw #zombiesonhorses

If you light your smoke off a flaming zombie head can you get infected? #zombiesonhorses

Zombie just delivered mail-they can do menial tasks-quick, get them to join social media-ha. #zombiesonhorses

Oh yeah. That zombie. Is riding-wait for it…A horse. Boom. #zombiesonhorses

“I’m going to go the stealth route, alone.” *starts unloading his gun, stealth style* #zombiesonhorses

Pig’s a filthy animal, zombies don’t eat filthy animals. #zombiesonhorses

Hey look, it’s the love child of Michael Biehn and Joe Pantoliano, if you can dig it? #zombiesonhorses

Cheap Shot #2: That bird noise was well amplified, and completely superfluous. #zombiesonhorses

Ah, the twin reveal late in the game. But to no real avail. #zombiesonhorses

Why is this hard ass suddenly soft-not consistent nor a true character progression. #zombiesonhorses

This zombie better eat this horse now, c’mon. #zombiesonhorses

Protip: Never walk up to your zombie twin. Ever. #zombiesonhorses

Zombie just peeled old mate’s hair back like a hood-nasty scalping. #zombiesonhorses

Hanging upside-down next to a zombie-it’s like a game show, or an exercise-it’ll really work your core. #zombiesonhorses

YES! That zombie is now eating that horse. Golden. #zombiesonhorses

Old man hick zombie shoot out. Seriously. http://twitpic.com/25e3k3 Lame. #zombiesonhorses

I give Survival of the Dead 2 Cleveland Steamers, it’s just not worth the effort for more. #zombiesonhorses

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And that’s all I got to say about that.

I was always going to see it, it’s the master, but man, I won’t be watching it again any time soon.

Have you saddled up with the zombies on horses?